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onlinecounsellingcollege

How to Deal with Toxic People

onlinecounsellingcollege

If you can’t escape the toxic people in your life:

1. Don’t allow them to manipulate you into acting in certain ways (For example, don’t allow them to control you by being moody, demanding or rude.)

2. Don’t tip toe around them or live your life walking on egg shells.

3. Don’t make excuses for their bad behaviour or their inappropriate and over-the-top reactions.

4. Don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself and to call things what they are (Often we are too polite to say anything, especially in social settings. However, that just perpetuates the situation, and keeps you feeling trapped and negative.)

5. Don’t allow them to play emotional games. For example, speak up when they are being rude and offensive by saying something like “Was it your intention to try to make me look bad when you said that?) Often a direct approach, especially in public, is very effective.

6. Establish personal boundaries. Do not allow other people to treat you in rude or disrespectful ways. Remember that we teach other people how to treat us!

7. Remember not to take things personally as it’s really about THEM, and not you.

thecalminside

Anonymous asked:

I've noticed that I feel fear only when I'm not aware of my body. When I'm focused on the outside. But when I'm aware of my body and thoughts fear disappears. Like it's a sign to be more aware. Have you noticed anything like this?

thecalminside answered:

Yes, I have. This is the basic principle of mindfulness, which I’ve been practicing for years now.

If you pay attention to your body, to your thoughts and feelings, you aren’t stuck in them and so you aren’t narrowed by them. When you do pay attention to these things a more natural, fundamental state arises and that is a peaceful one.